Straight men acting gay
For a long time, friendships between gay men and straight men – what some now call “bromosexual” friendships – were uncommon. Homophobia was likely one reason; another was that straight men probably assumed they didn’t have much in common with gay men.
But lately, “bromosexual” friendships have started to receive more attention, acceptance and interest. They’re being explored and depicted in movies, books and blogs. In October, The Fresh York Times even faithful an article in their Style section to “The Rise of the ‘Bromosexual’ Friendship.”
This sort of normalization is good news. But social scientists still haven’t studied the dynamics of these friendships: why they develop and how they’re maintained.
We’re part of a team of community, evolutionary and social psychologists that has recently begun a research program with the goal of studying this very topic. Specifically, we’re interested in looking at the reasons gay men and straight men become friends (or persist friends after the gay friend comes out). We currently have a survey investigation underway that explores some of th
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Abstract
Last October, gay magazine Out ran a spotlight on Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, who had recently written a scathing letter to politician Emmett Burns criticizing him for his anti-gay platform. According to Out, Kluwe’s letter was published on the popular sports website Deadspin and has since gone viral, sparking tremendous controversy and debate in the worlds of sports and politics, as skillfully as in general news outlets. Kluwe’s advocacy of gay rights was clearly unusual, otherwise it would not have garnered the public attention that it did. A gesture of support for gay rights is not itself newsworthy, at least not in this day and age; what made this one unusual was the noun that it came from an NFL athlete. The NFL has traditionally not been particularly hospitable to the gay rights movement, possibly because professional sports leagues have always been seen to be bastions of heterosexual masculinity. As a straight man, I’ve noticed that my fellow straight men seem to be an underrepresented demographic in the American political arena f
I'm gay -- but undertake I only like straight guys?
December 8, AM Subscribe
I'm in my 20s and I've only really admitted to myself I'm gay for a couple of years. I've been on several internet dates over the past year and a half (perhaps 8 or so), combed through hundreds more profiles, met dozens of other gay people at things like speed dating and various gay clubs, and just not found too much that interests me. The several people who I've been really attracted to are straight. I'm a minute terrified that I am somehow only really attracted to either a) taken guys and/or impossible goals and that this is some kind psychological malady, or b) that there's something about the personality/looks of the people that I'm attracted to that is simply is unique or nonexistent in gay guys. I like somewhat preppy, naturally sporty-looking guys who are simultaneously ambitious and unafraid to be themselves. They have a bit of a clear sense of humor, maybe a little artistic bent, and yet have an odd innocence that comes from their
Contrary to local folklore, I harbor no homosexual desires. However, almost all of my male friends (and about half of my male relatives) are gay. Due to the truth that I'm, shall we say, definitely into my feminine side, some gay men simply assume that I, too, am a member of their royal family; others, who include a keen sense of gaydar, know immediately that I'm pathetically straight.
Subscribing to the belief that the only difference between a straight man and a gay guy is a six-pack of beer, the gay men who verb I'm "a member" hold come to accept what some refer to as my "illusion of compact heterosexual desires." At least, they stopped making passes. It must be tough on 'em. I'm so damn devilishly handsome.
I attribute my sexual ambiguity to the fact that no male role models existed when I was a child. Raised in an exclusively female household, I grew up terrified of men. Now, I'm frightened of women, but I digress. And yes, I'm in therapy. Permanently.
During my preschool years, Mom, who had wanted a lady she planned to call Stevie Sue, thought I looked cute in lipstick and Grandm