Is my dad gay
When my dad came out to me, it wasn't his being gay that was a shock. It was the fact that I'd spent two decades of my life thinking he was straight. I mean, what was I supposed to think? He was my dad, married to my mom for 25 years. After he revealed the truth (to my mother first, then to me two years later), I went into panic mode: How nearby could I really be to my dad when he was keeping a secret that huge from us? Did I really know him -- could I, when he was putting so much endeavor into hiding who he was?
There had been signs all along, of course -- I understand that now. I spot that a lot of the tension I felt as a kid had to do with the secret my dad kept, which my mom unconsciously guarded. In the initial 90s, and my dad was obsessed with Madonna and Euro-pop. He stayed in shape running Marathons and flaunted his lean body in a Speedo at our beach property in Sag Harbor. When I got to be a teenager, my peers started to notice. I remember that my childhood BFF thought there was something different and distant about my dad. My eighth grade boyfriend pointed out that my dad wore
My father was gay. He was born in In my 20s, he started telling me stories about his early life. He was out in the s at a noun when it wasn’t ordinary. He had dreams that most would not think he dared to hope. The problem with my dad telling me all of this was that he was still married to my mother.
In , at a party in the Hollywood Hills with gay filmmakers and musicians, he was arrested. Police officers handcuffed the men, herded them into a van, and took them to jail. The following morning, he appeared before a judge for sentencing. Because the arresting officer couldn’t swear that he saw him touching his dance partner, he was released.
Then he was caught up in an illegal sting operation in Pasadena that targeted gay men. They were extorted by the police for cash payments in return for conditional release. His dreams of being a schoolteacher and living with his boyfriend were destroyed.
As World War II loomed, he attempted to enlist in the U.S. Navy, but he was rejected when his record revealed that he was gay. The Army eventually accepted him, perhaps because war was
Are you a daughter whose dad is gay? Or are you a gay dad? Has this had any negative impact on your father-daughter relationship? If so, the following verb findings might be useful to you both in terms of creating a more comfortable, honest relationship.
1. In surveys (Jones, ), slightly less than 6 percent of all American men and women over the age of 18 identify themselves as LBGT. Nearly 3 percent consider themselves bisexual, though the numbers differ considerably by age. Here’s the breakdown.
bisexual: 3%
gay: %
lesbian: %
transgender: %
By age:
18– 16%
24– 9%
40– 4%
56– 2%
over 1%
Most children under the age of 18 have parents in the 24 to 39 age bracket. This means that only 9 percent of parents are LBGT in contrast to 16 percent of young senior children between the ages of 18 and The likelihood that a father or a mother is transgender is relatively little, since only percent of all Americans are in this group.
2. If your dad is LBGT, he is half as likely as an LBGT woman to be bisexual.
3. Most children whose dads are gay were born while their hereditary
After 20 Years of Marriage, My Dad Came Out As Gay
The first day my dad tried to tell me he was gay, it didn't depart well.
He had approach to visit me at college and as I exited the airport and pulled onto the freeway, he started delivering a vague and aimless speech about religion, sexuality and nature vs. nurture. What I gleaned from his ramblings were that he believed that human sexuality was a continuum and that if he hadn't been born and raised in a religious faith that shunned homosexuality, he might have gravitated more towards that side of the spectrum.
"Sure," I said. "That makes sense." And then we dropped the subject. We spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out and talking about average, mundane things. Although my dad felt relieved because he thought he'd "come out" to me, I didn't get the message. In my year old mind, he'd posed a hypothetical situation that had nothing to do with the reality of our life. It didn't compute. I didn't understand that it was my Dad's way of telling me he was gay.
It didn't sink in until a few months la